It’s inevitable that among the many presents bestowed on you when you have a baby, there will be some you don’t like.
While these are easy to regift or hide in a bottom drawer if they’re from an acquaintence, unwanted gifts from family can be tricker to ignore.
So one mum has found, after her mother-in-law keeps bombarding her with clothes that just aren’t quite right, as she explained on Reddit.
“The problem is, the clothes she gifts are all really girly. Some of the clothes she has bought him include: a pink shirt with a crown and the words ‘Beauty Queen’; a pale pink onesie with ‘Girl Power’ spelled out in flowers; a white onesie with ‘Nanna’s girl’ embroidered on in pink; and a pink tutu,” she shared.
Not everything has been pink, but has also included a frilly romper with red and blue flowers, a frilly romper with a beehive fabric that she fears is a choking hazard, and a onesie two sizes two small.
While the mum said she has no issues with her son wearing pink – saying he already does, as well as clothes with love hearts and other non-traditional ‘boy clothes’, she felt these were ‘something else’.
“I always just say ‘thank you for the thought but he has plenty of clothes’ and if she asks for ideas I suggest ‘what about a toy or a book?’. Mostly she just says anything we don’t need to pass onto a friend who can use it, which I do,” she continued.
“Everything was fine until MIL asked over Easter why my son never wears anything she gives us and I explained it’s all a little bit girly, but I have a friend who has a girl and we swap clothes. MIL huffed that ‘she didn’t think people worried about that these days’.”
The mum further explained she buys her son dolls and that ’95 per cent’ of his clothes were gender neutral, but that while still a baby ‘he doesn’t need his shirt to state if he’s ‘l’nanna’s gir OR ‘nanna’s boy’.
“My MIL says I’m being too fussy and it’s not fair she never gets to see him wear anything she’s given him and ‘giving away excess I don’t need’ isn’t the same as “giving away everything they give him,” she said.
And asked Reddit if she was going to far on this stance. Many however felt that maybe the behaviour was masking her MIL’s gender disappointment.
“It’s obvious your MIL wanted a granddaughter. She doesn’t get to run that agenda on your son,” said one. “These aren’t ‘girly’ clothes, they are GIRL clothes,” agreed another.
“Also, how are they going to explain this to the kid if he sees pictures later on? ‘Oh, Grandma gave you that’. Well, great. Now he knows grandma wanted a granddaughter and he’s a disappointment,” said a third.
“I was ready for YTA (you’re the a**hole) because honestly who cares when it’s a baby (?!?).But this is not about non-gender conforming clothing, this is about gender affirming (Nanna’s girl, really??) clothing which pushes an agenda/fantasy that an adult has,” another chimed in.
“Get her a shirt that says Worlds best Grandpa,” one user joked.